Hey, yo, what’s crack-a-lackin’ on the job front, y’all?

Check this: how’s about you and me stay up all night and maybe even ball some weekends squeezin’ out corny-ass creative for some failing automaker? Can I get a “hell yeah” for Consumer Packaged Goods y’all?

Throw ‘em in the air if you wanna sell cereal, motherfuckers!

That would be sick, right?

Word, yo, you need to hop in your whip (that ‘96 Sentra you inherited from your mom), drive your gangsta ass down to BBDO Dusseldorf and hook up a dope gig dropping phat shelf-talkers for Crispix and snot-stick inserts for zines like Modern Bride and shit!

Y’all feelin’ me?

Tight, right? So let’s strap up and do this, bitchez! Drop the brief, let’s rock some creative! This ain’t no fairy tale, this is real life, ya heard?

B to the Bizzle to the Dizzle-Ohhhhhhhhhhhh!

F*ck yeah! I work in advertising!

Now get back to work before I outsource your ass.

I think when you’re at a bar or a party and people start talking about The Hills, Jon and Kate or one of those shows, you should just silently stand up and leave the room. Don’t even grab your jacket.

Time to read this.

Hat tip to Ryan.

Population: this guy.

I didn’t think the Rolling Stones had any new ideas.

I was so wrong.

FriendsEAT is reporting some disturbing news:
Stock up on Slim Jims, everyone. They will be in short supply during the coming months. ConAgra, the company that makes the Slim Jim, has not produced the beef jerky treat since a Garner, North Carolina processing plant exploded last month, killing three employees. This was the only facility in the country that made the dried beef snack and plans are not yet finalized to have them produced elsewhere.

Fans of the Slim Jim are already hoarding whatever supplies they can find at their local truck stops and convenience stores, even willing to take boxes that have expiration dates from earlier in the year.

Because, you know, if you can’t get Slim Jims, there are literally no other jerky options available in the US.

So they’re expired, who cares? This is too important a time to turn into some kind of germ freak. Buy! Buy! Buy!

What the screaming hell is this?

So long story short, my business Twitter account was temporarily suspended, and for no apparent reason. Apparently, I’m not alone.

Which reminds me of that Michael Jackson song, which reminds me: did you hear he’s dead?

It got me wondering: what do you do? I’m not paying for the service, and I’m certainly not entirely reliant on it, but it’s proven a very useful tool at times.

So what am I supposed to do? Basically, I can do one thing: wait.

That’s sort of weird. We don’t wait anymore.

If Shitter were a paid service, would it work better? Maybe. But nobody would use it.

This is the first time something on the Internet has truly screwed up for me. I’m sure it’ll get sorted, but it’s weird to think that I really can’t do ANYTHING.

Well, it’s been a while since I posted, but sometimes you just see something you need to get out there.

My friend Barn’s site, RockPeaks.com, went live this week, and it’s looking pretty awesome.

I worked a lot with Barn on the site and can attest to his passion for both music in general and this project in particular.

Billed as “the world’s largest database of live rock and roll video” (man, we fought a lot about the term database - and I lost) the site serves as an aggregator of awesome clips and a community that allows users to comment, review and share knowledge about those great performance clips that stir a little something-something deep in your gut.

Stuart Berman has already given it a real nice writeup.

Get your ass over there and sign up!

Congrats, Barn!