Hey, yo, what’s crack-a-lackin’ on the job front, y’all?
Check this: how’s about you and me stay up all night and maybe even ball some weekends squeezin’ out corny-ass creative for some failing automaker? Can I get a “hell yeah” for Consumer Packaged Goods y’all?
Throw ‘em in the air if you wanna sell cereal, motherfuckers!
That would [...]

Hello, poison control? You’ve gotta help me, I just ingested this commercial and I feel all weird and sweaty.

Totally deviant.
Hat tip to Nerfgun.

I like everything about this except the corny-ass ending, which is, I admit, probably not the response they were looking for.

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This just in from Dethroner; excuse their typos, they were probably going as fast as they could to get this story out there, and I salute them for it.
The marketing gurus are Dr. Pepper think they can have their cake and eat it too! If, as anticipated, Axl Rose can not complete his opus: [...]

On this test, it is pass or fail. You either get 100% or zero. Zilch. The square root of diddly. Dickety-slam.
I did not get 100.

Brilliant.

I never knew it could be this easy.